


Letters for Bella

by Bookloverstar



Category: Twilight Series - All Media Types, Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Bella Swan with a Backbone, Drama, Drama & Romance, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Smut, F/M, Romantic Comedy, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Slow To Update, Strong Female Characters, Volturi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-11
Updated: 2020-07-11
Packaged: 2021-03-04 22:06:56
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,497
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25193638
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bookloverstar/pseuds/Bookloverstar
Summary: After her devastating 18th birthday Bella's life is turned upside down. Forced to move on and pick up the pieces of what would have been her happily ever after; she decides enough is enough and does exactly what Edward wanted her to do: Live. So when she is dragged back into the life of the supernatural, can she fulfill the same promise, or will her drive to live ultimately lead to her death?
Relationships: Alec/Bella Swan, Alice Cullen/Jasper Hale, Carlisle Cullen/Esme Cullen, Emmett Cullen/Rosalie Hale
Comments: 5
Kudos: 26





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> So welcome to the plot bunny that wouldn't;t leave me alone! Inspired from a late-night conversation I thought of after 3 sleepless nights. Slow to update as I want to finish my other story before I continue with this one but I promise, updates are coming soon! Please let me know what you think and above all - 
> 
> Enjoy!

“Sometimes life is cruel and we have to accept that or we spend forever in torment” – Jane Eyre  
…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

“…When I was younger I saw, my daddy cry and curse at the wind. He broke his own heart and watched...as he tried to reassemble it…”  
“Maybe I know somewhere deep in my soul that love never lasts and we’ve got to find other ways to make it alone and keep a straight face”

This is my life.

My solitude of Jane Eyre and Paramore. Haley William’s voice rings throughout the empty apartment while I simply stare at the wall with an empty notebook in my lap.  
Moments like these make me realize how much of rock bottom I have truly hit.  
Hanging my head I rise off the floor while said notebook slips to the ground with barely a noise. Going to the fridge I take milk out of the fridge, smell it, deem it drinkable and take a gulp.  
Going back I stop and stare at my reflection in the bathroom. My eyes looking red with bags hanging and dull skin I look like a walking corpse. How ironic.  
Letting a sigh slip I grab my jacket and sneakers along with my phone and keys lock the door and head out to the hall. The steady drip, drip of the leaky roof settles my nerves as I walk along to the stairs smiling at grandma once I reach the bottom of the complex. Grandma, as I deemed her, is the elderly woman who is like a 1,000 years old (or really in her 90’s) who lives down the hall from me and has cats everywhere. She’s a sweet thing, maybe a little too cheerful for my tastes but hey, to each their own and whatnot.  
Getting old red out of the lot I smile as I blast the radio with the windows down, unashamed at my music. The rain is not that bad tonight especially for this little spontaneous trip down to forks.  
Turning into the old driveway I get the key out of the plant and unlock the door. Memories come flooding in, entering this place again.  
My old home never felt so comforting.  
Looking at the pictures on the mantle the tug in my chest lets me know my heart is still there. I take in a deep breath. A picture of me and Charlie look back at me; we were on one of his many fishing trips, him beaming with a salmon and I smiling shyly under his arm. It was taken a few weeks before his heart attack.  
His health was waning for a while and it was only a matter of time…the doctor said it must have been quick and painless and he was fishing when it happened. There’s a comfort knowing he died doing what he loved. Living his retirement by the lake. Still, it doesn’t make his death any easier, part of the reason why I look like the dead.  
Leaving everything to me I used some of the money in my trust fund to buy a cheap apartment in Port Angeles to be closer to my job. Saving up for college and all that.  
However, the house is the same but something was…different. Checking back at the door I noticed a huge stack of mail by the door. Odd since it’s been months that any mail has been delivered here.  
Taking the pile and dumping it on the kitchen table I took the letter most recently dated and looking at the return address I felt like an ice bucket was dumped on me.  
It was a letter from the last person I ever expected from- Esme Cullen


	2. A Letter to my daughter

_Bella,_   
_I’m sure I’m the last person you ever wanted to hear from, especially after what we did, but I couldn’t stop myself from writing to you in a vain hope you would ever write back. I’m so sorry for everything we put you through, for all the suffering you experienced because of us. As a mother, I would never want that for any child, especially you who I have looked on as my own._   
_I’m sure it’s quite silly of me to write down my apologies, no apology will ever be enough but it’s comforting to know that I have this connection, if unspoken. For all, I know you will never receive these letters and you will live on as you were meant too: free._   
_It’s quite selfish of me to even be writing to you, for there to have this slim chance of correspondence but I can’t help myself. I love you; you are forever my child…even from a distance._   
_With love,_   
_Esme_

_Dear Bella,_   
_It’s so pleasant here in whistler. Canada would suit you, I would think. It’s lively and beautiful and surrounded by nature. Perhaps you and your father would enjoy the scenery here, I know he was fond of the wooded areas of Forks, something whistler has plenty of._   
_How are you doing? Are you eating enough? Getting enough sunlight? I know it’s foolish to ask such questions, but I would hope you are doing well. The family isn’t the same without your presence. I know Carlisle misses you dearly but he would never go against Edward’s wishes. He was his first companion; did you know that? I think that’s why he lets Edward get away with much more than the rest. Frankly, I disapprove but to go against my mate even with these letters is the most I can do at the moment. Someday I’ll come back, just to see you again, to see how you have thrived and lived. I wouldn’t dare infringe on the successful life I’m sure you’ve made for yourself but I hope you are doing well. Live life, Bella._   
_With Love,_   
_Esme_

_Bella,_   
_Oh my dear my heart breaks for you. I saw that your father was buried today. I hope you are coping well. I wish I could have hugged you, could have offered some comfort to you at the memorial. I was there you know. I wanted to see you, to support you in any way I could. I saw that you’re living on your own now, setting a course for you in the footsteps of your father, you would be an amazing detective. So observant and full of the justice spirit. If it means anything at all, I’m so proud. So proud of the woman you’re turning out to be and –_

I couldn’t read anymore. I let the paper slip through my fingers as I looked at the date stamped on the envelope. It was dated yesterday. I can’t believe it. All this time.  
Looking at the piles of letters they were all from Esme. Every single one. No return addresses. If there was no return address, then it couldn’t have gone through the mail.  
Which meant one thing.  
Grabbing my keys, I raced out the door, praying that I didn’t lose my chance.

  
****

  
Arriving at the Cullen residence should have been more traumatic, but all I saw were empty windows. Except one. Closing the truck, I marched towards the door not even bothering knocking. She knew I would come.

Going to the kitchen, I saw her. She didn’t look a day older, no change at all. Her face broke into a sad smile as I stood rigid, staring at the mother figure I once knew.

“Esme” I breathed out

“Oh Bella” She whispered so quietly I had to strain my ears to hear. “You got my letters”

“Yeah, I got them which, according to them you knew where I lived. You could have delivered them there you know” I said stiffly as she bowed her head, looking ashamed. I didn’t know whether to be happy about that or sad.

“I know. I wanted to respect your privacy.”

“Uh-huh and that’s why you chose to write them on your stationery” I accused, shifting through my pocket as I held her latest letter.

“Please Bella, I know it’s unorthodox” She started as I raised my hand for her to wait.

“Unorthodox, you’re going to call this unorthodox? You asked me to come, in so many words at least because Edward’s life depended on it. Is that right?” I asked scanning her latest.

“Yes” She whispered

“And why would I do anything for him. Or for you for that matter” I asked scathing as Esme’s eyes brimmed with tears. I wasn’t falling for it.

“Because you’re a good person Bella and I know you wouldn’t want anyone to die when you could help them. Even if you hated them.”

Sighing deeply, I knew she had a point. True I hated Edward, well hate is a strong word since Charlie taught me hate is never good for a cop. Hate leads to bias, bias leads to unlawfulness and whatever. As a cop and more importantly as Charlie’s daughter it was my duty to help people. Even if they weren’t really people.

Making my lips in a thin line I relented and asked, “So what do you need me for?”

  
****

  
Never did I expect asking that question would lead me on a private jet, going to Italy of all places. Nor did I know Esme knew how to fly a jet. The more you learn.  
“So, what exactly do I need to do again?” I yelled, through my headphones. The damn things made speech almost impossible.  
“Just let him see you. He believes you died Bella and so he went to provoke the Volturi.”

Yeah, I got that part. Most powerful vampires, going into the lion’s den, might be killed. I got that part. I still can’t believe I’m doing this. Risking my life for this jerk off who decided to off himself. What a drama queen. You know upon further inspection I probably should be more worried about this but either my self-preservation is at an all-time low or I’ve simply been put in enough life or death situations for this to be a regular Tuesday.

Probably both.

“Yeah I got that part, I mean what’s the plan exactly” I yelled as Esme flipped some switches as we started to descend.“Well, Alice said we should be able to catch him in the square and if we time it right all it would take is for him to see you” She replied as she talked on the radio for clearance.  
As we landed, I was still thinking of ways for him to see us as Esme led us through the hanger. Following her to a bright yellow Porsche, she motioned for me to get in as she nervously looked at the clock. “It’s almost sunrise, we have to be quick.” She murmured as I put on my seatbelt, Esme driving like a maniac as she raced through the streets.  
“So Esme, why are you alone? Where’s the rest of the Cullens?” I finally asked truth be told I should have asked that a long time ago but hey, I’m only human.

At Esme’s guilty expression I tried again until Esme relented telling me “Carlisle wanted to visit his old friends. As soon as Alice got the vision, we all sprang to action. Rose and Emmett are with Carlisle and Alice and Jasper are trying to track Edward, they know he’ll be in the square but as far as his exact location we don’t know”  
“So, you’re telling me, you don’t know where he is and let me guess they sent you because I didn’t hate you as much?” I asked, a bit jaded.

“Well, Carlisle soon found out about the letters and once we saw what he was planning on doing I decided to be the messenger. That and I wanted to see you again” She admitted as I shook my head in disbelief.

Wow, okay.

“Well that’s nice” I bit out sarcastically “But it would have been nice if you came to me in person instead of writing me letters that you didn’t even know I would read because you purposely sent them to the wrong house”

“Again, I’m sorry Bella. But I would hope after this we could rebuild what we had”

“Yeah, I’ve heard apologies, I don’t want to hear them and Esme no offense but what we had was entirely based on a relationship that was built on lies. For everyone. May I remind you, I’m only going because I don’t want his death on my conscience.”

“Of course,” She said softly as she went to focus on the road, coming to a short stop in front of a busy-looking square. The sun was up, and I couldn’t see anything or anything we were looking for anyway.

“Look Bella there!” She grabbed my arm and pointed her finger towards a darkened alcove. It was very faint but I saw a shimmer. If he stepped out he would be a life-size disco ball.

“We can’t go out in sunlight Bella. I don’t think he can see you” She panicked as her eyes darted to the top of a darkened building, no doubt communicating with the other Cullen’s.

Fine. I know what I got to do. Right as I was about to make a mad dash across the square, out of the corner of my eye I saw three darkened clocks moving faster than any human should. Hearing Esme’s alarmed gasp behind me, I knew she could see them too.

“No! No, the Volturi, they have him! No, it wasn’t supposed to play out like this! They’re going to kill him!” She panicked even more and my instincts kicked in.

“Esme, I need you to chill okay? Where is there headquarters?” I asked urgently.

“What?” She asked

“The Volturi’s headquarters. They must have some, they operate somewhere I’m sure. Do you know where it is?”

“Yes, yes its in the castle. On the hill.” She pointed to an old and regal looking castle and I knew what to do.

“Get me there as fast as you can”

  
****

  
Racing through the streets, I reached behind me and got my knife, securing it on my belt buckle as Esme looked on curious.

Finally, we reach our destination, Esme took a sharp turn and raced into an underground tunnel hastily explaining “Bella there’s going to be vampires down this corridor, beyond that door there’s going to be a long hallway with double doors leading into the throne room. That’s where Edward will be”

“Okay, Esme what I need you to do is distract the vampires long enough for me to reach the doors. I have a plan I just need you to trust me okay” I said in all seriousness as Esme looked on desperately.

“Bella that is too risky, I won’t risk you that way!”

“No offense Esme but just bringing me here is risking me, got it! This is my mission and I’m seeing it through” She stopped the car suddenly and true to her word there was only one vampire standing guard and Esme, in a flash had her in a chokehold.

Slightly impressed I sprinted towards the door, following Esme’s directions my feet pounded on the marble hallway leading me to two double, ancient-looking doors. Taking in a deep breath I shoved my body against the door, bursting them open I ran inside.

There in the middle-stood Edward, standing rigidly still as Carlisle, Rosalie, and Emmett in a similar pose.

On three thrones above the floor sat three men, each with a range of expressions from curiosity to anger with people in dark clocks similar to those in the square all around the room.

Welp. Alright then. Feeling all eyes on me I ran to the middle, gaging my surroundings and looking back at the men. Before I could get a word in, one of them, with ice blond hair boomed “What is the meaning of this!? Who dared let a human into these proceedings!”

"Now wait brother, this is no ordinary human, I believe this is the human that dear Edward has come to die for, to follow her in death and yet –“ He stands and in a flash is right in front of me, looking at me in curiosity. I instantly took a step back.

“Here she is, very much alive. Curious.” He circled me like a vulture as I moved away from him, each movement I made just had his smile grow wider. “So curious” He kept mumbling. Just then the doors opened once more with a bigger vampire, who could pass as a linebacker, walked in, holding Esme closed as she struggled. Instantly she went rigidly still.

“What are you doing to them,” I asked, trying not to shake my voice. It sorts of worked.

“I’m not doing anything my dear, however, a more interesting question is why you, a simple human, are not affected?”

Clearly, he was more focused trying to figure me out and I could buy some time. “Probably because I’m a shield” I let out, not really understanding the purpose of those words but during my relationship with Edward it was thrown around enough to probably be a big deal. I hoped.

“A shield you say. Fascinating. You have such dormant powers young one. So potent. So much raw potential” He kept mumbling to himself. Feeling creeped out I took one more step back as I looked around the room. My eyes focusing more on a hooded figure nearest to the throne. I don’t know why but there was something interesting about them.

“Yeah,” I said clipped “So if you don’t mind, could you enlighten the human? Why do you have my friends?” I asked, squinting at the man who was still walking around me! “And could you stop circling me like a freaking hawk. Boundaries are a thing here, are they not?”

At my quip, he simply laughed, a big booming laugh that echoed off the walls before he quickly backed away. Finally.

“Our apologies young one, you see before you, ahem, interrupted our proceedings Edward and his family are standing trial for putting our secret, our very existence, in jeopardy. You see by letting a human-aware of our secrets, there is a risk of others knowing as well. That is something we simply do not allow. By telling you, they exposed us all.” He declared, looking quite proud of his assumptions.

“Okay, well, one problem with that, uh, your honor?” I guess not knowing what else to call him “but they never told me anything. I guessed I guessed on my own. I figured everything out.” I ground out, looking around the room as people whispered among themselves as the blonde-haired man scoffed.

“No human could figure that out. They’re not that clever” he jabbed at me, smirking. Okay, that made me angry.

“Oh yeah, try me. I know more about your world then you may think. I know that one of you can read minds, can see thoughts. Because of my shield I highly doubt you can read mine, so read Edward’s instead. See if I’m lying” I bluffed as felt beads of sweat roll down my neck.

“Interesting. Let’s find out.” Just then the dark-haired vulture that was circling me went to Edward and grabbed his hand, his eyes going blank. In a split second, he was laughing again and nodded his head.

“She is telling the truth brothers. This is no ordinary human in our company.”

Smirking I quipped “Yeah, you’re going to see I’m not ordinary anything”

“But still, there is the matter of our secret. I can see through young Edward’s thoughts you can be trusted but can you still be trusted even with your heartbreak?” He asked, his eyes gleaming.

At that I let out a short laugh “Yeah, I can do that since there’s no love lost between him and I. I have no interest in getting involved more than I already have. I don’t love him, and I can assure you he doesn’t love me” I said, my voice hard.

“You don’t say” He murmured just as Edward’s head moved and he regained the ability to speak.

“Bella, you don’t mean that. Sweetheart, you don’t know everything. I’m sorry for that day but please you have to believe me that – “ Cutting him short I had just enough of his bullshit. Wanting to have this conversation in private I realize that just maybe impossible considering the circumstances.

“I would really prefer to have this confrontation done in private but considering our present company” I led on as I turned to the three men who looked highly entertained. The fuckers.

“You all can hear me no matter where I am on the property right? This guise of privacy doesn’t exist with vampire hearing, am I right?” I asked as the dark-haired man nodded, smiling.

“Alright then, just checking” I took in a deep breath as I marched right in front of Edward, His golden eyes which I loved so much, just served as a reminder.

A reminder of how much bullshit he put me through.

“You’ve got some FUCKING nerve, Edward Cullen” I let out as his eyes widened and his jaw dropped. “To come here, beg for your death, and for what? You claimed you never loved me and yet your willing to ‘follow me in death” I ranted as I let my rage fuel me on “What kind backward, overdramatic, teenage angst fest is this shit! I mean, fuck! What is wrong with you? Like, I’m am genuinely concerned with your mindset. Oh, you had to break up with your girlfriend, oh poor Edward” I mocked as I glared, paying no mind to anyone.

“You know what you do? Hm? You get over it! Just like any fucking person, in existence! You move on! I had to do it! Had to do it so many times since you left! I had to get over my first heartbreak when my boyfriend fucking leaves in the fucking woods! Oh and the fact that my second whatever the fuck he was, Jacob, moving on with his mate! That was hard! OH! Let’s not forget losing not one, but two sets of parents within a month of each other! You know that! After all that pain! After all that suffering! Did you think I thought about offing myself! Well to be honest yes but see I didn’t have a family. I didn’t have anyone who cared about me. Certainly not anyone who would care if I was gone! Meanwhile, you have an entire family! A whole bunch of people who love and care about you enough to follow you and recruit ME, of all fucking people to save your overdramatic ass! Your mother tracked me down to save your life! What does that scream to you dumb ass!” I yelled as his eyes went to the floor.

“I saw you jump from the cliff. I saw you die” He whispered as I let out a strangled laugh/gasp thing.

“Are you fucking kidding me!? I was cliff diving! You know when you jump, from cliffs, for fun? I was having fun and quite frankly recovering from all the bullshit that you put me through! My gosh, I can smack you!” I yelled just as I lifted my hand to smack his face, forgetting that it was hard as stone. Hearing a bone crunch, I screeched as I bent down in pain, even angrier now.

“Oh, fuck this!” I yelled as I turned my back, just as two vampires stepped in my way.

You’ve got to be kidding me.

Turning around and breathing hard I saw the three men smirking and talking quietly amongst themselves until finally, the middle one stood up. The vulture.

“Ahh young one, my apologies but I’m sure you understand, after hearing that we can’t let you leave. Not yet anyway” He said smiling as I glared.

“You know about us, our ways and even wanted to be one of us at one point. What do you say I grant you your wish?” He asked as I stood up straight.

“Huh?” I asked dumbly just as all the Cullen’s started to wiggled free only for whatever possessed them to go down harder.

“You see, young one, we pride ourselves on being fair. Just even, something we have in common. So, although you may have guessed our secret, the Cullen’s are guilty of association. You see, young one, we have one rule and they broke it. So, naturally, there needs a punishment, although death, dear brothers, maybe a tad harsh for this circumstance” He turned to the other men as they nodded slowly.

“So, I have a proposition for you dear young one,” He said smiling, turning to me. “There needs to be a punishment but since you are the true victim, you may decide their fate.” He said with a flourish, smiling wider.

Raising my eyebrow in suspicion, I waited for the full explanation, this sounded fishy and I wanted to know their game.

“You see there are only two options here. You may either stay with us for say, two years, the same time duration of your relationship with young Edward here or you may go, with all memories wiped of the last four years and Edward will stay with us and receive a punishment that we see fit. It’s your choice.”

Huh? That is not what I expected him to say. Biting my lip, I asked, “Will I stay human, during those two years?” I asked, skeptically with Aro’s nod of assurance. “And what happens after? If I choose to stay, what happens after?” I asked trying to think of all the possibilities.

“Then you may leave, no questions asked, but that is only if you want too. I would think that after your stay if you choose too, you wouldn’t want to leave” he smiled as I thought about my options.

If I left Edward and the Cullen’s would be wiped clean from my memories. It would be a fresh slate, a brand-new start, and one more painful memory erased forever.

However, on the other hand, this could be a brand-new start too. A chance to reinvent myself from something other then the Cullen’s and my memories would remain my own. Although I would be happy to have all thoughts of Edward be erased, those are the final years with my dad and my mom.

I would lose them forever, and I couldn’t risk that. My memories are priceless. With steely determination I looked at Aro, his eyes sparkling like he could see my choice. In a way, I guess he could.

“I choose to stay” I whispered as Aro clapped his hands in delight, a jumble of voices around the room and Edward’s whimper, perhaps the loudest of all.

“It is done then” Aro degreed as he put his cold hand on my shoulder, his eyes glistening “Welcome to Volterra, Isabella Swan”


End file.
